Prince A.

Wow it's ages since I have last been here. This place is kinda linked to a very special time in my life, but things have changed so much and i get sentimental. Is it just me or does livejournal now seem like old? Like seeing one of those old 90s html websites? Looking back I almost get a heartattack at seeing how fast time flies!! Is it already 2 years since i first came on this blog? oh man!
If anyone out there of the people in my friends list see this, write me a little! I'd love to get to know you more, guys! I met some great people on here *cough*lunarblue*cough*mr.modular*cough*
So yeah, its late night memory time. Meeeeeeeemories, in the corner of my miiiind, misty water-coloured meeeeemories, the way we wereeeeeeeee *now EVERYBODY* THE WAAAAY WEEEEE WEEERE!!

I move aside your looks
sneak through behind your eyes
only to find me
looking at you
and you
undermining my looks
right through my eyes
only to find..

______________When I kiss you
are you there?
Metronomic pulse
________________sways in and out
My finger on your piano_________
Ivory sound.
_You go there, You're gone forever_
_________Through the looking glass..
____Breaking through this egg's shell..
only to find my breath on the other side.
[between your lips. inside my mouth.]



(written in a brief moment of inspiration while reading "Die unenteliche Geschichte" - a Princess Tutu fanfiction story by wreathsandbells)

To anyone who loves to garb themselves in mystery, to anyone who loves fog and blue neon light, to anyone who keeps their age a secret: My love is for you! XO









(PS: check out the rare song "Blue" by Wham! Love it to bits.)
()

From a balcony from beyond, I can see a lot of dirt.
I juggle back and forth the ups and downs of this medal.
But I see the holographic image, that is the truth,
putting its finger right down on that map,
marking this viral spreading
of this ever-traditional mobile pattern
where sheep are carnivores.
Merciless and disgusting.
I cannot ignore.
It moves through all kinds of streams of human herds.
And devours cripples.
I feel sick. They make me feel "the uglies".
To vanish, is the most glorious thing left to do.
To not have to breathe the same air as them.




(Inspired by the acts of Ayaan Hirsi Ali).

I pick you up, Alison.
Those euro-chic curves.
Down to your Riviera.

Let's take a ride.
To Rio.
He wants us to come.

- he/she is too skinny. eat a burger, dammit!

- i've never seen an uncut dick. eww gross. how unhygenic.

- awesome! oh my god!

- eww those vegetables were not wrapped up. unhygenic!

- i love europe! it's such a beautiful country.

- hi! i'm from FL.

- oh you're from austria? those kangaroos are so cute.

- kfc is my favorite restaurant.

Is there no normal interesting open person on earth, that likes conversation, finding out about other people and stuff?????? Everytime i chat to a new person, they are so lame, answering like one hour later and giving one word answers... i hate everybody who is like that! Most humans ARE trash really. It's hard to find a gem.

The memory of you means more to me than YOU, you fucking bitch!

Moving in own herds, how excellent!
Flesh and bones. Blood!
Ugly Auras, Male-ness!
Fungus, courage, wood in front.
Stampede tantrum! Spartanian Flex.
Cut it up! Rip it open!
Blood on teeth.
Penecillian Arrow. Let me ride you!

-here ar* s*m* n*w imag*s fr*m th* Sp*nk! g*rls' bl*gs. (http://spank.jp/p/staff.html)








( m*re )

And even if I use the word "I" admitting my smallness this little unfinshed piece asks for a miracle Let there be a klinamen spark
to get me out of here
and defy my stains

Lies and belief

An old friend just tried to call me, but i didnt want to speak to her. I dont have anything to smalltalk about, and i hate the question "and?`what you've been doing?" I rarely lie. I refused to lie for years, but slowly i find the idea of lieing getting better again, cause it's just pleasent to not always have to explain yourself, explain the truth and then cringe inside. I didn't feel much holier when i always said the truth. And it's also cheeky fun to lie sometimes. But I'm not a natural (anymore) because i sort of have to psyche myself up to lie. Like learning a script. Who am i telling this?? Seems like i am telling this an anonymous selfhelp group. But just for my own record its good to a p p e a r in a certain light, even if its untrue. And its also bullshit what those moralists tell you (lieing is bad bla bla). They oversee soemthing important. When other people see you a certain way, that can give you a massive boost. For example if you fake something, say you pretend to be more selfconfident than you are, and if people catch up on that and believe you are like that, THIS in return can have an uplifting effect on your selfconfidence for real. So lie becomes reality in the end. Its not a guaranteed recipe though. They always say: oh you gotta be strong yourself. Dont listen to what other people say. Go your own way. Buuuttt who would even feel a need to say that, if they didnt feel intimidated in the first place? Its all just band-aid. The way you are seen by other people, your image, is important for your self-worth. Then again, it's only a part of the whole thing.

















I love you, Clawdeen.

The Mediapsychodrome continues. Today I saw a bit of big brother. I shouldn't have, if i want to keep my faith in good hearted humans. Why is it that girls always like asshole guys? This girl, treated badly by one of the bb guys, since the beginning, is now suddenly turning out to feel more for him. First she didnt like him, there are also other guys, but the number one asshole who is left there, of course she has to pick him. Even though she always made sure to portray herself as the lil miss knows it all, the reasonable one, the one who is so clever and logical and diplomatic. Oh go to hell you two. All assholes and girls who pretend to be so for the nice ones but then go with the assholes: do me a favour and kill yourselves. Yep, I can really relate to Galaxia in the scene where she says: humans are trash. Watch out everybody, i might steal your star seed and rule the galaxy.


[[[[[You've got a heart of glass or a heart of stone
Just you wait 'til I get you home
We've got no future, we've got no past
Here today, built to last
In every city, in every nation
From Lake Geneva to the Finland station
(How far have you been?)]]]}}}}}

I am sitting here, late night, been crying over an hour ago. Ate junk food, too much this time, i hate it, i love it, but i hate it, and i wanna be animalic enough again to say: i will neeeeeever ever eat this fuckin crap again, but i am too much of an observer of myself, and too out there behind and between my own glass wall, to really say and mean and feel that. Oh god i am such a leftbrain. I am surf through the internet, beaching on my loves blog who has posted a myriad of new posts some make me laugh other sentimental. Gets me inspired, a little piece of moment of non leftbrainedness. I feel fired up to write a bit and thoughts come to my mind, sentences like: "it's really creative but nobody cares".. funny coincidences happen these days: san diego and another thing i cant think of at the moment. But suddenly somehow a lot of thigns that i read about have something to do wtih san diego. Not that i am interested in s.d. but it follows me wherever i read. Yesterday watching the arte news they squeezed in a little death note about a philosopher called jean baudrillard. Never heard of him before, but somesomesomething got me to find out about him more on google. Maybe one of those links and winks of life. Read a few essays of him. And understand exactly what he is on about. Wish he was alive cause i would write him a letter (calling it latter not email), but he went beyond. Consumersworld. I feel empty. My life is pretty much dead. And i write in a language that is not my mother tongue. I don't know why. Baudrillard wrote an essay called the madonna deconnection. Totally agree with him, as i see her too as a symbol of capitalism and the perfectness-leading-to-emptiness. Western world, oh where do you go from here? All this information. Over-informed. Deformed. I need an excorcist to get all those images and expactations infused by the media out of my system. I will never be a star. I will never be rich. Everyone's matrixed. Oh god i even use the word matrix, i am sick. Thank god i am not american. I would already be beyond return. Not to close to the solar wind. Dont know what shape my life will take. I havent got a single clue. People scare me. I am not fascinated by most humans today. And i hate myspace. baudrillard i feel the same. All those images, and in the meantime unnoticably the emptiness subwooves you. Rant off. Dont know what to say anymore. breathe out. stop.

Today something weird happened. They used my image composition over at elouai, which i find really strange. Its on their front page for the new candybar dollmaker 3. How did they know of it??? I made this image in october:



When you head over to elouai http://elouai.com/doll-makers/new-dollmaker.php they use everything that i composed on the frontpage except for the background. This can't be a coincidence. So either someone from over there knows about my blog, or every image ever composed gets somehow saved (though that would still be amazing that mine stands out). I feel somehow flattered.

Here's the one on their site:

Hey! For my next flat i will definitly buy this glamorous piece of furniture and goldfrapp everything up! Note to self: work hard and get money!!!!!!!



Oxford Dictionary:

'glamour'

(US also glamor)

• noun an attractive and exciting quality.

— ORIGIN originally in the sense enchantment, magic: alteration of GRAMMAR, with reference to the occult practices associated with learning in medieval times.

Alice in wonderland is a fantastic fairy tale. And this time it fusioned with my favourite sanrio charas the little twin stars! I'm lovin' it!

My jewels for: give
Come the evening
Be.
An Ace
A whisper
Your sword on my shoulder
Precious, precious Valentine.













(PS: I have a new secret obsession: Film Noir - shady atmosphere, vamps, streetlights, voice-overs)

I am so hyper because I received "Kirby Power Paintbrush" yesterday! It's the ultimate Nintendo DS game, I swear! I loooove Kirby to bits! And this game is fantastic! I can't stop playing, drawing those rainbow lines that Kirby slides along.. weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!